I feel haunted but still not wanted.
Ghosts of the past, they come after midnight,
when I'm blinded by the moonlight.
And as I dream,
they whisper to my ear
all those things I don't wanna hear.
They are the memorandum of lost hopes and pain.
But they also remind me all those things I gained.
I hear them knocking, they are close.
Will they come in? Because the door aren't closed,
but ajar
and the ghosts aren't that far.
Wind is playing with my curtains.
Can't you see that I'm hurting?
Can't you see I fell apart
after he broke my heart?
Ghost number one,
the man that I love.
Ghost number two,
the one who beat me black and blue.
Ghost number three,
will I one day be free?
As they come and as they lay
next to me, I kneel and pray
,,Dear God, if you're real,
I cannot bear how I feel.
Please, take me with you as your servant.
My request is really urgent.
What I have to do
to sit on a cloud next to you,
to step through the Heaven's gate?
I know I never had a faith
but if you do this, I'll believe,
never again make you feel aggrieved
and gladly accept my punishment.
I will look at you in astonishment."
Then I put a knife onto my wrist
and stole myself the precious gift
of life that was once given to me.
Perhaps this is how it was supposed to be.
Me, laying in the puddle of my blood,
smiling and saying goodbye to my life.
